A Good Tree Produces Good Fruit

This is a very good book.  When it comes to people changing, I tend toward skepticism.  It's difficult for people to change, and in my experience many do not, at least not for the better.  But this book does a good job of explaining that, while change may take place within, it is not from within, but from without.  The message of the whole book is captured in one paragraph on page 189:

"As we say yes to the Holy Spirit, his living water produces new Fruit in our hearts: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.  These character qualities aren't an ideal standard that God holds over us.  They are gifts the Spirit produces in us.  This change within us changes the way we respond to the things around us . . . .  And this is the Fruit that results: Kind people look for ways to do good.  Patient and faithful people don't run away when people mess up.  Loving people serve even when sinned against.  Gentle people help a struggler bear his burden."

It's a frustrating process, because "working hard at it", at least directly, doesn't really work.  I can't truly be more patient with my children by willing myself to do so, though I might outwardly succeed in reigning in my impatience for a time.  But it would be wrong to say that my problem is that I express my impatience rather than controlling it.  My problem is that I am impatient, even though God has given me all that I need.  The only solution is to let the Spirit produce patience within me.  I can only pursue it indirectly by making use of the means of grace God has made available.  This is the meaning of not pursuing good works "in my own strength".  I have to let the Spirit change my motivations rather than trying to short circuit the process by directly changing my outward behavior.  This is difficult to remember and difficult to wait on, particularly if you struggle with impatience!