This book was originally published in 1906 under the title, "The Cynic's Word Book," a title which I think I prefer.  I don't think I'm a Victorian holdover, I just don't see a devil enjoying cynicism the way Bierce does.  For a devil, cynicism would be a tool, or even just a normal way of seeing the world.  The truth is that cynicism stings because it throws light on the dark corners of human nature while pointing the way directly to how things really ought to be and how people really ought to behave.  

For example, Bierce defines "penitent" as "[u]ndergoing or awaiting punishment."  So the cynic rejects the concept of repentance, replacing it with mere regret -- "I'm sorry I got caught."  This kind of commentary is very useful to those who practice, or seek to practice, repentance, because it reminds the practitioner that one's own motives are not always obvious or intuitive, not even to oneself.  So I'll seek to repent to my sins, but I will do so humbly, with the realization that my repentance, like my conduct that led to my need for repentance, will be imperfect and incomplete.  And I will repent for that, too.

But enough of the attempt to draw moral insight from this snicker-inducing piece of entertainment.  This must be the most quotable book in the world.  Therefore, here are just a few of my favorites:

INTERPRETER, n.  One who enables two persons of different languages to understand each other by repeating to each what it would have been to the interpreter's advantage for the other to have said.

KILT, n.  A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans in Scotland.

LAWYER, n.  One skilled in circumvention of the law.

MARRIAGE, n.  The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

OVEREAT, v.  To dine.

TELEPHONE, n.  An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.

UN-AMERICAN, adj.  Wicked, intolerable, heathenish.

YEAR, n.  A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.